Fall is in full swing, and there's plenty happening in our community!

In this edition, explore our Les Bons Plans for seasonal family-friendly activities and exciting happenings within our community. In our Community Spotlight, meet Elena Covo, a fellow-mom and family therapist, as she shares her insights on family life. Our À Table! section takes us to Greece with a delicious recipe for Spanakotiropitakia, traditional savory pastries. And, as always, catch up on the latest TÉPA Highlights and what's coming up next!

Happy reading!

Les Bons Plans*

Looking for family-friendly cultural outings? November in New York: smashing, skating, sparkling and sword-fighting. Take your pick!

• ⛸️ Ice Skating's Season is opening!

  📍Several locations across the city 📅 Starting Oct 31

  Get your tickets at Gottesman's rink at central park , Wollman rink, Bryant park rink, Le Frak ice rink at prospect park, or  The Rink at Rockefeller center

• 🎃 Hudson River Park Pumpkin Smash

  📍Pier 84, 555 12th Ave, New York, NY 10036 📅 Sun, Nov 7 - 12pm to 3pm

  Bring your jack-o'-lantern to Hudson River Park to squash, smash, and smush it into compost to help keep the park beautiful, green, and growing! Info here .

• 🪔Diwali Festival of lights at the Children's museum of Manhattan

  📍212 West 83rd Street, New York, NY 10024 📅 Sun, Nov 8 - 10am to 4pm

  Spend the day at the CMOM to celebrate Diwali, with a full program of paper collage workshops, Dance performance, Story time and a puppet show! Infos here.

• ⚔️🛡️Gladiators NYC in Central park

  📍Lawn behind the MET 📅 Sat, Nov 14 - 2pm to 4pm

  NYC's premiere medieval event, featuring knights in full armor fighting it out in the middle of Central Park, every second Saturday of the month! Free. Check out @gladiatorsnyc on Instagram for more info or here

Do You Speak Français?

• 🇫🇷🇺🇲 Le Salon de l'éducation bilingue à New York at Villa Albertine

  📍972 5th Avenue, New York, NY 10075 📅 Sat, November 7 - 10am to 3pm

  If you are reading this newsletter, your School's choice is certainly made, but le Salon also offers an interesting cycle of conferences on rising Bilingual children. Free. registration required.

• 🇫🇷 En Français, Oui But Why? at The LFNY cultural center

  📍505 East 75th Street, New York, NY 10021 📅 Sat, Nov 21 - 12pm to 5:30pm 

  This Francophone Cultural Fair brings together its many communities to celebrate the Fall season with a giant spelling bee, a theater performance, and many French products and organizations to discover! Free entrance. Info here.

✨ From Our Community

• 🔥 Āzar — A Taste of Persia in Brooklyn

  📍740 Driggs Avenue 📅 Grand Opening: Saturday, November 7 · 12PM

  Fardad and Annabelle, parents of Daria (8/4e) and Leo (5/CM2), are bringing Persian street-style flavors and grilled specialties to Williamsburg with their new restaurant, Āzar! Opening this weekend, it's one to add to your must-try list!

• 🍸 Dante Elizabeth Street

  📍210 Elizabeth St, New York, NY 10012

  Linden and Nathalie, parents of Millie (3/CE2) and Noa Grace (5/CM2), have opened Dante Elizabeth Street! The latest addition to the Dante family is a charming new spot for everything from sunset cocktails to a leisurely dinner.

• Maison Sōm × Marbré — One-Day Pop-Up

  📍186 5th Ave, Brooklyn 📅 Saturday, November 14 · 10 AM

  Sophie (Ethan’s mom in K), founder of Maison Sōm, will be hosting a one-day pop-up at Marbré, featuring exclusive tartlets inspired by their signature madeleines!

💡 Have an event or tip for Les Bons Plans? Send it our way — we’d love to share it in a future edition! info@theecolepa.org.

Follow TÉPA for more bons plans:

• Instagram: @theecolepa

• Facebook: @theecolepa

*good tips and recommendations.

Community ⁠Spotlight

What brought you to NYC and how did you start working in couple and family therapy?
I graduated as a licensed clinical therapist in France in 2009, and in 2012, my partner and I had the opportunity to move to San Francisco. I decided to study Marriage and Family Therapy for two reasons. First, it was very close to what I had been doing in France. I had studied psychoanalysis, which aims to understand a patient in their entirety and to understand where they are coming from. It’s very important to me to understand a patient as a whole in order to treat a symptom, and to understand the patient within their context.

Besides, I was a young adult at the time and was in a long and serious relationship. I felt that we were not really taught the tools to understand how a couple works. So I wanted to use everything I had learned about systems, trauma, and attachment styles. They play such an important role in the way we behave in relationships, whether consciously or not. I wanted to dive deeper and develop the right tools to understand negative relational patterns and help couples change them.

I arrived in NYC in 2018, right before the pandemic, and so I started doing telehealth sessions. Today, I still do some remote sessions, as well as some sessions in my Flatiron office.

How can a family strive to become as functional as possible?
I think it’s essential to first determine what a functional family is. The first words that come to mind are harmony and respect. A family that functions well is a family that allows each member to exist as an individual and to feel loved and respected. That doesn’t mean that everything is always going well, or that everyone is always happy, or that no one ever argues. A functional family is not a perfect family.

In a family, just as in a couple, what’s important is to feel emotional safety. Everyone should be allowed to be themselves and to express their emotions, their needs, their frustrations, and their differences without being afraid of losing love or affection. For kids, it means being loved and accepted as they are, even when they don’t meet expectations.

I also want to insist on the fact that conflicts don’t determine whether a family is functioning well or not. Everybody has conflicts in their daily lives, with coworkers, friends, or partners. What matters is how you end the conflict, repair the relationship and how you show accountability. 

To me, a functional family is also a balanced family, where everyone finds their place, with their own roles and responsibilities. Children must be children; they should not be involved in their parents’ problems. And parents should be able to be parents while also maintaining their individual identity and their social relationships.

You work with many French-speaking families. Do you see specific dynamics or difficulties among people who live far away from their home country?
I see two different contexts. Some families move to the US for a couple of years as “expats,” and everything is handled by their company. But there are also people who are immigrants and don’t necessarily know how long they will stay, or whether they will ever leave one day. The situation is more complex because you are putting down new roots and need to build a new life.

It can be especially challenging for a partner who follows the other one, because you need to put aside part of your identity, whether professional or social. If one partner has less social or intellectual stimulation, they may expect more from the other partner, who is very busy, and that puts strain on the relationship.

They also worry about how to give their children their culture. Families who are here for a short stay are happy to have their children learn English and discover a new culture. But families who are here for the long run are worried that they will lose their home language and culture. Many factors play a role in how well a child will adjust such as age, temperament, and local network. The school system also plays a huge part. It’s definitely easier to find a sense of belonging if they go to a French school, as they may find peers who are in the same circumstances, but it’s still difficult to adjust to a new environment. Parents should listen to their kids and help them put words to their emotions. It’s possible to be grateful to live abroad and, at the same time, find the experience difficult.

Besides, living abroad can reveal certain relationship dynamics that may have existed before but were not as apparent. At the same time, with a good network, good communication, and a long-term vision, it can also be an opportunity to redefine family dynamics according to your own values, instead of simply reproducing the model from your home country. It can be a way to find new resources and a new balance.

Can you recommend some books to our community?
The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read, Philippa Perry
This book invites you to reflect on your own story, how you were raised, and how that can influence the kind of parent you become. It also explains how your attachment style plays a role in your relationship with your own children. It reminds us that no parent is perfect, but that accountability is essential, as is making space for repair.

Hold Me Tight, Sue Johnson
An introduction to the foundations of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), attachment needs, and the negative cycles that can develop within couples, with tools to help de-escalate tensions.

The Body Keeps the Score, Bessel van der Kolk
This book explores the impact of trauma on the body, emotions, and relationships. I often recommend it to patients to help them understand trauma and how it can be reactivated in everyday situations, including when we become parents ourselves.

Learn more about Elena and Wellness Journey Therapy here.
Follow Wellness Journey on Instagram here.

[For the full interview, visit our website!]

*** Be Our Next Guest! ***
Do you have a special talent, unique hobby, or business you’d like to share with our community? We’d love to feature you in an upcoming Community Spotlight! If you’re interested in being showcased, please reach out to us at info@theecolepa.org.

À Table!

Thank you Agathe, mom of Xenia in 5th grade, for sharing this recipe of spanakotiropitakia, traditional Greek savory pastries filled with a mixture of spinach and cheese! 🇬🇷

Parent-Owned Business Directory - Now Updating!

TÉPA Highlights

🎃 Class Gatherings & Halloween Treats

Halloween brought plenty of festive cheer to Maternelle and Elementary students, with goodie bags, sweet treats, and classroom celebrations following the parade! Meanwhile, class gatherings are well underway, with many classes already enjoying opportunities to connect outside the classroom.

A big thank-you to our class reps for their creativity and dedication! These special moments are made possible by the $85-per-student class fund, designed to support community-building and create memorable experiences throughout the year.

🪶 Thunderbird Dancers: Celebrating Indigenous Cultures

On November 3, Kindergarten, 1st, and 2nd Grade students enjoyed a special performance by the Thunderbird Dancers in celebration of Indigenous Peoples’ Month.

Through storytelling, traditional attire, and captivating performances, students discovered dances including the Butterfly, Raven, Eagle, Warrior, and Hoop dances. They also learned about the natural materials used in traditional regalia, from eagle feathers and porcupine hair to deer hooves. A wonderful celebration of Indigenous cultures, nature, and heritage!

💬 Affinity Groups: A New Space for Everyday Conversations

Our affinity groups continue to grow! This month, we launched Everyday Questions & Ideas, a welcoming space to ask questions, exchange recommendations, share advice, and chat about everyday life. All topics are welcome, except politics!

Explore the groups through the “The École Families” WhatsApp Community. Have an idea for a new group? Submit your suggestion here and help bring like-minded families together!

What’s Next from TÉPA

🎁 TÉPA Holiday Gratuity Gift Pool — Coming Soon!

It's almost that time of year! Our annual TÉPA Holiday Gratuity Gift Pool initiative is just around the corner. It's time to come together and show our appreciation for the wonderful teachers, assistants, staff, porters, and security professionals who make our school community so special.

Stay tuned! Details on how to contribute will be shared soon. Let's make this holiday season a little brighter for those who do so much for our children all year long!

💙 TÉPA Community Care Fund

The TÉPA Community Care Fund provides financial assistance to eligible families for after-school programs, school camps (excluding summer camp), uniforms, lunches, and select overnight trips.

Thank you to all families who submitted applications for Semester 2 after-school programs and the 7th & 8th Grade Sicily trip. Applications are now being reviewed, and families will be notified of financial assistance decisions.

For Semester 2 after-school programs, decisions will be communicated ahead of general registration on December 7. For the Sicily trip, assistance may cover 10–20% of the total cost, depending on the number of applications received and available funding.

For any questions, please contact TÉPA.